A bit of a girly fashion rant today so if you're not in the mood for such blathering, don't read on...
I speak to all the women out there with this ancient cry, this woeful wail, the mystery of the incredible shrinking pants!... I know nearly everyone out there has had this experience, the moment when we realize that our pants, the very pants that so luxiurously fit our lovely curves nay a scant week ago, these pants have been attacked by the sinister shrinking gnome that lurks in our closets, unseen, striking at our most vulnerable hour, when we were just beginning to bask in the glow of fitting into all our "tiny" clothes again. I retrace my steps to a few weeks ago...
The weather had begun to warm and I had courageously tried on last season's spring clothes, trying to not be too optimistic about my chances of fitting into any non-maternity pants, when to my great surprise I found that I could fit into most of my spring pants, and not only could I fit into them standing, but I could still breathe when I sat down, and it was entirely possible that I might even be able to eat a small snack without breaking any seams - amazing! I spent the next two weeks excitedly wearing my spring wardrobe, praising myself for not cowering in my maternity clothes as I did last spring, feeling even slightly optimistic that maybe I could conquer that last little bulge left from the baby. Then came the week that the pants were strangely tight again, and in my wonderful new optimistic haze I decidely thought "water weight", "bloating", "bad indegestion", nothing to worry about. Then came another week of tight pants, and another, and another, repeatedly trying on said pants again, and again, and withstanding long moments of trying to sit in them without breathing and realizing the only snack I could eat in them would be my last gulp of air.
So now here I am, realizing that the evil gnome has struck again - blast you, you little invisible bearded fool, your cunning magic has shrunk my lovely spring wardrobe again and I think 14 months after baby is definitely too late to be re-donning my maternity wardrobe, sigh. This week I finally found a few pairs of new pants that fit me without making me look like a bag lady trying to hide my beer gut but I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to wear one style outside - the "gaucho" pants - sooooo extremely comfortable in their knit-ness that doesn't make me have to suck in my magically enlarged gut, but I either look very suave and sophisticated in their flowy-ness or I look like a bad 80's koolats flashback, oh well, best to not wear the keds with these : )
And please, after reading this, don't send the "You're crazy, you're so skinny!" hate mail because while it is true that I have always been naturally skinny I have been 'thickening' just like the rest of us since college, and while my own thickening may have been delayed it is none the less painful when I am donating trunkloads full of clothes to goodwill every other year. Besides, we all have our skinny and fat moments, even those size zero women have them (I hope), and waking up to find you have grown a jelly roll around the middle overnight (yes, I swear, it literally grew overnight) is truly horrifying and leaves you to question everything you have been eating and doing, and not eating and not doing. I am still trying to stay positive and believe it is some sort of side-effect of the new birth control pill I am on, but since it's been three months that's getting harder and harder to prove, so, I'll just resign myself to the fact that my body must just be having a good laugh at my expense and at my upcoming 30-year milestone, hurray, break out the exercise shoes.
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3 comments:
Yes, you look okay in the gaucho pants. But, I agree, don't do the keds thing with them. If only my butt wasn't so big, I might try them. You like stretchy pants and I like shirts that are loose around the waist to hide my baby stretched tummy! I never thought clothes post baby would be so horrific. :) Of course, the reaching 30 milestone is not helping either. At least we have cute babies to show for the strange things that have happened to our bodies.
Okay, first off, there will be no "you're so skinny" talk here. When you feel crummy about pants not fitting, you can be a size 2 or a size 22. It's no fun.
That said, let me share one insight I have from my many years of experience as a fat girl. There are times (and I'm experiencing one now, for example) where your weight or body size jumps up without a direct explanation in your diet or exercise regime. I know, no one wants to believe this, but I'm telling you, it's true. That's not to say you can't do things with your diet or exercise regime to fight the fat off---you can! But the cause of your sudden surge in thickness might be due to something completely different. I'm talking about stress. You have a lot on your plate now---a lot of upcoming change, a lot to do, etc.---and that can stress a girl out! Once you realize you aren't fitting into your skinny pants, more stress is added, and the cycle continues.
So, here's what I say---give yourself a break, and really, really, really let the pants go. I emphasize "really," because I have gotten rid of pants that don't fit (in order to let them go), but have still beaten myself up for having to give them away.
Do a little more exercise, eat oatmeal for breakfast, snack on veggies---all that stuff will help. But most importantly, don't buy into the crummy stress cycle that "failure to fit into skinny pants" can create. I say that as someone who has literally been in and out of that cycle for 15+ years. Save yourself the pain, chica, and you'll be in skinny pants before you know it, I swear.
And for the record, I've seen more doctors than I can count about my weight over the years, and the really good ones always say the same thing---the medical world is basically clueless about this stuff. Sure, taking less in and burning more off is the answer, but so often, different people's bodies react so differently to the same calorie intake and activity expenditure, that they have to throw their hands up and say, "this is more complicated than we'd like to think." So, maybe in your case, it was the new medication slowly changing your hormones, coupled with other stuff going on. Who knows? Hang in there, though, whatever the cause may be.
Hugs, chica. :)
As with the others, no "you're so skinny" hate mail - you have always been skinny, but it's true that not fitting into clothes that used to fit sucks. There's not a nice way to put it, and it's true regardless of what size you are.
But at least you've got the "I had a baby" excuse. The reason that my pants don't fit is likely going to have to be chalked up to "well, I ate too much and sat on my butt too often."
Ah well.
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